Today I said good bye to my beautiful friend Trix.
She came into my life at a difficult time and I certainly wasn't looking for a new horse but here she was and I wanted her to be mine.
And boy, did she become mine. Never have I had a horse attach itself to me in the way that she did. Maybe I was one of the few people to ever show her kindness but I promised her, that if she looked after me, I would look after her.
Her trust in me was a weighty responsibility. We knew she wouldn't be around forever but not one of us thought it would be over this quickly.
She has not been 'right' since Easter. She came through the GNZ Trek really well, in fact she amazed us all with how well she coped. But then she just wasn't right.
And she just never has been since. So the decision was made to say good bye and not see her decline any further. I just hope it was the right thing to do. My confidence in my ability to make decisions is at an all time low.
Such a special horse in among so many other special horses I have been privileged to know.
I think, I just want to have one now that truly feels like it's mine. There have been so many recently and I am scared of the hurt that comes when things end.